Tric Kearney

I live in Ireland and am a mom to four children, One is a pre teen, two are teenagers and the eldest is in her twenties and away at college.

Most children go through a phase in early childhood of shyness.
They are slow to answer a question directed at them,
and cling to a parents leg,
or try to hide.
This is quite normal behaviour.
Children usually learn to overcome it,
within a reasonable period of time.

 

However for some children this is not the case.

At home these children are happy, boisterous, assertive and chatty,
but in certain situations they freeze.

No amount of encouragement will get them to speak.
They avoid eye contact,
and may not even nod or shake their head in response to questions.
It is not only strangers that they have this reaction to.
Some may not speak to grandparents, family friends or other children.
These children have selective mutism.

It is a relatively unknown condition,
affecting 1 in a 1000 children,
although it is believed that this is a relatively low estimate.
It is strongly linked to social anxiety disorder.
Most are diagnosed between the age of 3-8 years,
but most parents said their child exhibited symptoms of excessive shyness in infancy.

Without treatment and help,
life is very difficult for these children.
They imagine themselves “on stage”,
so within social settings they experience the equivalent to stage fright.
Some are paralysed, others may experience actual physical symptoms,
headache, nausea, abdominal pain or even vomiting.

The behaviour will usually extend to school.
Even though in many cases these children are well liked,
they do not develop good social behaviour,
and may eventually become very isolated.
School work may also be affected.

The good news is that with support and treatment,
the outcome is usually excellent.
The important thing is to recognize it,
and to seek help early.
Most parents who have brought children for treatment,
reported that they knew a few years earlier there was a problem.

Signs your child may have selective mutism

  • Profound shyness. The child freezes and ignores all questions directed at them. This behavior may also occur when being addressed by well-known adults or other children.
  • Little eye contact. The child may look down or stare into space motionless and expressionless.
  • Withdrawal. The child may hide or go quiet when out, anticipating having to speak.
  • Parureis, The fear of using public restroom, perhaps fearful of making noises others may hear.

If you are at all concerned visit your doctor.
Your child may be referred to a trained professional
who can help them to overcome their anxieties.

Related reading
http://www.selectivemutism.org/

photo credit: ~FreeBirD®~ via photopin cc
photo credit: Jagadeesh SJ via photopin cc


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